Stabbed

At least it wasn’t death by a thousand cuts, like in Jessica Jones. That seems increasingly painful and escapable. Silence is the one stab that will slice off a major body part that may have otherwise been taken for granted. The shock of it meant that she didn’t actually believe it happened. The one moment he was there, accompanying her through her day, the next, gone. A ghost.

Ghosts hurt the most. Their silhouettes are there and present and a constant reminder that was once real is no more. The girl is in pain and reeling. It was so confusing. She knew that he thought of her, she knew that he craved the life they could have together. So why suddenly do this?

It was a normal message. One that didn’t need a response. He feared normal. Detested it. She hoped that one day he would see that in that now sad, desperate message, what she was really desperate for: the chance to tell him that he was the sun to her moon. The obvious truth that he was a light person attracted to dark and she was a dark person who needed the light, and that was why they were so perfect for each other. She wanted to tell him that his voice made the sea flow through her body, and his tone caressed her spine, embracing it in it’s warmth. She wanted to tell him that she has never been able to trust anybody else’s touch but his, and she has no logical explanation as to why – she was young, how could she have known that he would be the only one?

Her mind screamed no, don’t speak, wait. But her heart couldn’t take it. It needed to protect itself, but it also had to connect. WHY THE DISCONNECTION. If they communicate so well? Unless he was lying. She cannot believe that he was. She believes it is simply too soon. She hopes that he will see past the message to everything else she wants so much to tell him. The stuff she knows he will see too. But instead, she’s been stabbed by a ghost she never had at all.

When someone makes your dreams come true, it’s hard to believe they were ever real in the first place. At least the memories (dreams?) are real.

She wonders if this is all because he made her cum once. The first time. The only time by a man.

It cannot be. Some things are transcendent. Like ghosts.

 

 

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